From Anxiety to McDon's

A lot of my blogs are funny, but I feel the need to get this off my chest..
but I'll try to keep it lighthearted (;

I am writing this blog from my home...
which is not where I'm supposed to be considering I have class until three on Fridays.

buttttt...
yesterday I had an anxiety attack. My mom and I decided the best thing to do would be come home.

Anxiety is something I've suffered from for quite some time now.
I am on meds for it, but sometimes it just gets overwhelming.
And because of my anxiety, sometimes I suffer from depression.

People say, "Well, it's all in your head."
And they're right..
it's something in my head that I can't control.

I wish I was just making it up, because that would my life a WHOLE lot easier.
But when you really have anxiety, you really have it.

When I start stressing out about something, I can't stop.
It consumes every hour of every day.
The latest thing was if I should try out for the ISU dance team or not.
It felt like the be all to end all either way. HUGE pros and HUGE cons to me.
Because all of this, I decided it would be best not to, and focus on MYSELF.
(I also had food poisoning this week so..)

I get anxiety about weird things...weird things.
I have quite a bit of social anxiety, and sometimes that just makes me really awkward.
It's part of the reason I don't go out.
I HATE being in big groups of people.
Sometimes I feel like everyone is staring at.
I get paranoid everyone is out to get me.

I can be thinking in my head, "This doesn't make sense."
But at the same time, I can't control my maniac mind.

I don't really get stressed out about homework.
Right now, I'm stressed because I DON'T have homework, and I DON'T have finals to study for.
It helps me to be doing something, so I can distract myself.

I don't know why I decided to tell people who read this this information.
Maybe for myself, maybe so people can understand me more.
This summer and coming year, I'm just going to try really hard to help myself.
I only want people who are kind and can understand that sometimes I do struggle.

I'm not writing this for people to feel bad for me. I want people to understand me, and understand other people who suffer from this. 

On a lighterrrr note, yesterday I was at the McDonalds drive thru, and I decided to get a BBQ Ranch Burger?

Oh gosh, it was awful.

It had Fritos on it, I was not warned of this.

Why is everyone trying to put Fritos on sandwiches?

Subway's was delicious, and they gave me a warning.

McDonalds, no where in the name did it say FRITOS.

BBQ Ranch Fritos Burger? Not name brand? BBQ Ranch Corn Chip Burger?

It was McNasty.

If any of ya'll have any questions about anxiety, me, or McDonalds, just feel free to ask!

Email: ahill1325@gmail.com
Twitter: @alannajean2013
Instagram: lanlanbaby